Getting Back into the Groove

I have to say it has not been easy getting back into the groove of things at work. I have not had the best work week and in all honesty, I wish I could quit my job. I am not being stimulated or using my mind because quite frankly there isn't enough work to be done. I have to keep busy and my mind active or I end up going crazy. I am watching myself to make sure that the lack of work, motivation and mind stimulating activities doesn't bring out my depression/bipolar. When I hit rock bottom in 2002 my job I believe had a lot to do with my situation. It is no where near as bad as it was at Regions, but if this continues I do not see how it can be healthy for my mental and emotional well being. I have looked to see what employment opportunities are out there but sadly there are none. I even looked beyond my field but it's just dry. Unless I want to be a pipe fitter or something manual then I don't have a prayer.

The auction ended for the computer I put up on ebay and we made a nice profit off of it. It's just going back to the pot to help pay for the items we did decide to keep. I'm thinking perhaps we should not have purchased all of the items that we did, but how can you not when it's so inexpensive? I'm on the new laptop right now and I love it soooo much. Mackenzie told me tonight that she wanted a computer for Christmas. I am so giddy with excitement because that is one of her gifts. I know Lee was looking for a Dora mouse. I'm thinking she would enjoy a Barbie one better. I'll have to see what I can find.

It has been unusually warm weather this week. The high tomorrow is suppose to be 77. It's still 63 degrees right now and it's already 10:00PM. I think I'm going to try and head to bed. I'm going to dream of what it would be like if Lee was a GM of Margaritaville and I stayed home w/ Jackson and picked Mackenzie up from school when it let out every day. Maybe Jackson would go to preschool but it's less than $150 a month. I could work part time doing something I love but be able to finally see my kids grow up. Have energy to have dinner on the table. Have energy and go to all of Mackenzie's practices and games. Yes, it's all a dream but a nice one to have.